Camping out

Dropped Josh off today at a local farm area that the scouts use for camping, fishing and general service projects. It's really great, just six miles from our house (and a grocery store), but rural enough so that you lose the light pollution from the town.

For some strange reason though, he didn't pack his tent stakes. He tells me that, and I just don't even know what to say besides "I'm sorry to hear that." So I'm hiking around with the girls, finding fallen wood for their fire tonight, waiting for him to say something about it. You know, ask me to go get them, bring them out, whatever. He didn't pack his knife or his hatchet, so it's not like he could cut some. When we had enough of digging out rose rocks and breaking up branches, I told him we were going to head back into town. Looked him in the eyes and said, "If there is anything you need, like tent stakes, now is the time to tell me...." 

He just smiles and says he'll figure something out. So, now is when as a mom I bite my tongue and refrain from saying "Are you sure?" in a doubtful voice. Because he obviously has a plan of some sort, and I don't want to cross that line between facilitating and enabling. So I managed to shut the heck up and let him manage it on his own. I didn't get a phone call...although I even took a nap with my cell phone. Just. In. Case. 

Growing up doesn't happen all at once. And it doesn't even happen without some learning takes. I don't know whether I should take this as a sign of maturity or a sign of his disconnect. Because he does have a great deal's worth of that. He always has...which is why unschooling has been a blessing, he's been able to mature outside of those expectations that schools have. That doesn't mean he will always be like that. I remember reading a post on a group in which the mother shared that people were telling her that her child was too clingy. The assumption is, I guess, that whomever she is at eight years old, is who that child will be for the rest of her life! What in the world? No one expects that if an adult chooses to eat a burger for lunch, that this person will choose McDonald's burgers every single day for the rest of their lives. But if a child chooses a snack of whoppers or cheetos, suddenly the assumption is that this child will develop NO self control and no discipline and will grow up fat and lazy on a standard American diet. 

We are all continuously growing, including our kids. Let them grow. 

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